The sky is blue, birds flit in and out of the invasive species growing in the wasteland next to the concrete “garden”. Weeds and mud, more vivid and lifelike than your yard. Life prevails, life expands, life conquers.
You never conquer. You will never conquer.
You stare at the next door wall, waiting for a spark of inspiration, a reason to exist, a reason to take that next breath, to eat that next meal. Something to animate the corpse in which you live out your allotted days.
Tomorrow is as today, today is as yesterday. Progress is just stepping further along the beige conveyer belt that leads to the final end. Was this a journey worth having? Is today worth your carbon footprint?
If you were not loved you would be able to yield to the living, but too weak to force upon your friends a sacrifice, you must accept tomorrow and all the responsibility that comes with it. Though you see no way to be deserving of life, you have no right to die.